A New Year: No Fear?

Your steadfast love, O Lord, extends to the heavens,

Your faithfulness to the clouds.

Psalm 36:5

New Year's Day is always a good day for reflection.

In education circles, we encourage our students to stop and reflect periodically, and then use those reflections to revise their plans going forward. I don't know about you, but so often I find the pace of life so crazy that "pause and reflect" opportunities certainly don't present themselves and they are even difficult to schedule. But the wise person schedules them anyway.

As I look back over 2017, there are many thoughts that come to mind. If this is not the first post you've read, then you know that 2017 was the hardest year I've ever had to face. It took me to my knees, literally and figuratively. At times, it was all I could do to put one foot in front of the other, and just keep going; often, that was my only goal. Some of those in our circle of friends looked at us and said, "You're doing so well" or "You two are such strong people" or some such thing. In reality, it often felt as if we were barely holding on. You didn't seem me weeping in my car in the parking lot and then struggling to pull it together before heading in to the school to teach my classes. You didn't see me lying awake late at night (or early in the morning), nor hear the thoughts chasing each other through my head as I wrestled with what I could have done differently, how I might have failed my boy as a father, what I could have done to rescue him from the path he was taking. I would have done just about anything to change the outcome. But the things I could affect weren't really the things at issue; David had the free will to make the choices he made, the choices that eventually took his life. And so I often found myself on my knees, asking God for my boy, asking God for the courage to trust Him when things looked so hopeless. And after David had passed, asking God to help me take that next step, and the next. Asking God to heal my heart, which felt violently ripped open. Asking God for my wife, and my daughter, that He would hold and heal and comfort them in ways I just could not.

Faithful

And so, as I look back over 2017, the consistent theme of the year is a God who is Faithful, through every single step I have taken, every new milestone I have had to face, every need I had, every pain and doubt and fear I faced. My God has faithfully walked beside me every single moment of every day in 2017. My God has faithfully provided the help and the strength, the courage and the healing, the friends, the prayers, the comfort that I needed for every thing I faced. Why? Because I am such a great guy? Because I'm such a faithful follower of His? No, a thousand times No!

God has been faithful because it is who He is. Faithfulness isn't just part of His character; it's the other way around. He is the definition of the word! 2 Timothy 2:13 says, "If we are faithless, He is faithful, for He cannot deny Himself." (emphasis mine). God's faithfulness, therefore, is not dependent on my performance, or yours! And God is not necessarily being faithful to you or me; God is being faithful to Himself, to His character, to His reputation, to His plans and promises. But part of that includes His faithfulness to me, and to you if you are also His follower.

Chris Tomlin, in his song Faithful, writes:

Faithful, forever You are faithful
Father to the fatherless
You uphold the one who feels forsaken
You are faithful, God

Faithful, forever You are faithful
Lover of the wounded heart
You defend the poor and the forgotten
You are faithful, God

And I will sing to the maker of Heaven and Earth
God, You reign forever and Your love will endure
Faithful and true is the name of the Lord
You are faithful, God

Faithful, forever You are faithful
Shelter for the fragile soul
You lift us up, You hold us all together
You are faithful, God

You are there in every season of my soul
You are there, You're the anchor that will hold
You are there, in the valley of the shadows
You are faithful, God

As I now look forward to 2018, I find myself settled and at peace. Is it because my circumstances are peaceful? Not necessarily. In just a few short days, we will face the first anniversary of the loss of our first child. At work, there are things that I face that I'm not confident I am ready for, or even capable of. My parents and in-laws are aging; will this be a year where I must say goodbye to another one that I love? My daughter is not only planning for post-secondary education, but thinking about reconnecting with her birth families; what will that mean for her relationship with me, with us? The world at large is experiencing great unrest; what about the impact that will have on me, and on my family? I don't know the answers to all those questions.

But I do know the One who does have those answers. I know His heart, and I know His faithfulness, both intellectually and experientially. I have so many memories of the times I have tested His faithfulness, and found it to be wholly trustworthy. This is why I can face whatever is coming; I know I won't face it alone, and I know He will supply whatever resources I need, because of His faithfulness.

And for you, dear reader, I wish the same: that you would come to experience and know the faithfulness of the Faithful One, the God who created you uniquely, and loves you unconditionally! Won't you give Him your 2018? I promise you, you will never regret it!